Sweaty James Island Dad Regretting Mr. Incredible Costume

A sweaty James Island dad is already regretting his choice to wear a Mr. Incredible costume for Halloween. Josh Singer’s entire body is heavily perspiring through the bulky muscle and polyester outfit, and two more hours of trick-or-treating with his kids remain in the grossly humid weather.

Josh bought the Mr. Incredible costume three weeks ago and thought the over-the-top size would be hilarious. Now with temperatures in the high 80’s paired with intense humidity, Josh wishes he opted for the soccer player costume instead.

Josh is struggling with swamp ass and fading fast. “What the hell was I thinking with this costume? I can feel every inch of my body sweating. If I don’t get a bottle of water soon, I’m going to pass out. Why is it so goddam hot outside at the end of October?”

Josh’s wife, Melissa is making matters worse by trying to adhere to a #TrickOrTreat100 hashtag on Instagram. “I intend to post a picture of my kids trick or treating at each house until I reach 100. Everyone is going to be so envious of me. Josh needs to suck it up until I’m done.”

Josh’s sweating will accelerate when the woman down the street pressures him to drink a glass of her hot homemade apple cider. At the end of the evening, Josh will finally get to peel the saturated costume off his body and throw the garlicky-smelling mass in the trash.