Confused Moncks Corner Teen Blasting Rap Music In His Confederate Flag Flying SUV

A Moncks Corner teenager turned heads on Wednesday when he blasted rap music from his SUV flying a Confederate flag. Clint Hill caught the attention of local residents as he drove through the Walmart parking lot with Big Sean on full volume, directly contradicting the message his truck’s flag was sending.

Clint has been the talk of Moncks Corner for weeks. Usually dressed in a sleeveless camo t-shirt and jean cargo shorts, Clint likes to drive around town with his extra-large confederate flag flying from the rear of his Dodge Durango. Moncks Corner residents have been absolutely perplexed when he plays rap music and aren’t sure if he even knows what happened during the Civil War.

Clint said he doesn’t understand why people have been giving him such dirty looks lately. “I don’t know what the big deal is,” he said. “Sometimes I just like to cruise through Walmart playing my favorite jams before I go home and watch the Wendy Williams Show. What’s wrong with that? People need to learn how respect others.”

Cultural Anthropologist Heather Murray said this type of contradiction is quite common in the south. “Most teenagers think the Confederate flag looks cool and stands for southern pride,” she said. “But they don’t actually understand what the flag originally represented. So when they fly the Confederate flag while spitting lyrics to their favorite rap songs, they look like hypocritical morons.”

Clint will give his parents a stress-induced stroke when they discover he’s been watching Empire on the family Hulu account. He will then be enrolled in a Southern Heritage Reprogramming Rehabilitation Facility where he’ll watch old episodes of Dukes of Hazzard and listen to Lynyrd Skynyrd non-stop for eight weeks.

11 Comments on "Confused Moncks Corner Teen Blasting Rap Music In His Confederate Flag Flying SUV"

  1. The Confederate Flag stands for a lot of great Southern States who were trying to get away from President Lincolns taxing them so much on their exports. The reason Lincoln fought so hard to keep these States in the Union was because they made so much Money for the Country he couldn’t afford to let them go! As far as the Confederate Flag and Rap music? What’s the problem? Just goes to show all the ignorant people that Racism has nothing to do with this great Flag! Heritage not hate!

  2. This has to be the most ignorant piece of drivvel I have ever read! Do some actual research about that flag before you try and say it is racist. First off, the Civil War was NOT faught about slavery. That came a few years into the war. That was just a battle flag representing a southern regiment. Today it is just a symbol that represents southern pride. The people who say it is racist are in fact the ones who are racist!!

    • Out of curiosity, and because I’m amazed you were able to read the entire story, exactly what war is that battle flag representing? Was it that one where those traitors to the United States tried to use the argument of State’s Rights to keep slaves? Because that flag is white.


  4. WOW! It’s sad that so many have become so ingrained in the culture of political correctness that they
    have lost touch with reality. SMH!

  5. Hahaha!! The comments on every piece will forever be my favorite. I’m not sure any of them know what the word “faux” means.. but unfortunately I’ve lived in the South my whole life, and this is very very real.

    Thanks Squad!

  6. This is Satire for people who didn’t catch that, meaning its a joke and yes its also meant to offend but its in no way serious or for real.

  7. To the guy who said Lincoln was taxing the south on exports, I’d say that’s an illigitamate excuse for defending the flag. S.C. Seceded less than a year after Lincoln was sworn in. That being said the economy was set up that the north would receive all the material wealth (cotton and tobacco) to be made in the textiles. If southern states didn’t like this system then they would’ve industrialized, they had the capital to do it. However that didn’t happen, the south was concerned with protecting the institution of slavery. That was southern culture at the time. Though the majority of southerners weren’t plantation owners, many of them worked on plantations, as overseers and clerks, in the markets, both slave and agricultural, or in shipping products. In other words everyone was affected by the plantation, and therefore the institution of slavery became part of the southern culture. When Lincoln was elected many people thought, justifiably, that he would dismantle this institution and their culture would be destroyed as such. Eventually tensions would escalate and one of the most disgusting wars in U.S. history would be fought. Regardless of your opinion of the war it is not debatable that this was the most destructive wars in our nation’s history. It took the south years to rebuild what had been lost. All that said, I don’t have a problem with the confederate flag. If you have pride in the confederacy, southern heritage, or just like the way it looks by all means fly that flag. Personally I view that flag as a symbol of one the bloodiest wars in United States history. I’m from South Carolina, born and raised, but I have no pride in that flag. My pride comes when I look at the 50 stars and thirteen stripes of the United States. I’m proud of the American democracy created in 1787, I’m proud of the nation that helped bring France out chains, the nation that brought an end to fascism in the Far East and Europe, I’m proud of the nation that went to the moon, I’m proud of the nation that allows me to say this. You know recently there’s been a lot of strife between liberals and conservatives. I think anyone who seriously studied the civil war, without revisionism or by unfairly judging it by modern standards, will realize that this type of slander is seriously unhealthy for a nation. Perhaps everyone needs to be reminded “we are all democrats, we are all federalists” -Thomas Jefferson

  8. lollercatskatesmokeweedeverydayhitlerdidnothingwrong | March 8, 2017 at 1:36 pm |

    Gotta love the idiots who

    1. Still defend the flag
    2. Don’t know what satire is

    Please continue to be stupid in public forums, you’re great entertainment for the rest of us.

  9. Hahahahaha!!!! I’m absolutely loving the butthurt in these comments. “My Great Granddaddy didn’t die defending slavery! He was a good man.” “But sir, the South Carolina one page article of secession said Slavery or Slaves 18 times. Surely you can’t possible believe…” “Shut up, shut up, shut up. Great Granddad was a good man!” “Maybe, but he fought for the right for whites to keep blacks as….” “lalalalalalal, I can’t hear you over how awesome Great Granddaddy is.”

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