Summerville is fed up with Goose Creek residents overwhelming their stores and restaurants with their kind, so now they’re going to do something about it. Mayor Wiley Johnson announced plans on Saturday to build a twelve-foot wall across I-26 and Hwy 17-A to keep all Goose Creek residents out of their beloved town.
Mayor Johnson said Goose Creek will pay for the wall. “Goose Creek is going to pay for every last cent of that wall. It’s not our fault their town is so boring. If those Creekers want to come to Summerville, they can come here legally and establish residency just like everyone else has. It’s only fair.”
A mob of angry Summerville residents protested outside city hall on Saturday. Most of them were wearing hats that said ‘Make Summerville Great Again’ and holding signs that read ‘Send The Dirty Creekers Back Home.’
Goose Creek Mayor Michael Heitzler said, “We’re tired of Summerville’s inflammatory rhetoric. We’re not paying for no damn wall.” When asked why so many Goose Creek residents flee for Summerville on the weekends, Heitzler said, “I don’t know why. With our pawn shops and payday advance loan stores, there’s plenty to do here in Goose Creek.”
Some of the local Summerville businesses are concerned about the construction of the wall. Summerville convenience store owner Denny Yates said, “When the Goose Creekers are gone, who’s going to buy all my Skoal tobacco and Monster energy drinks?”