Just a week ago, Mt. Pleasant unanimously approved a new outdoor Saturday morning fish market, earning praise from local foodies. Refusing to be outdone by Mt. Pleasant, the city of North Charleston has just announced plans to launch a new Marijuana Farmers Market to showcase the Lowcountry’s freshest ganga.
The North Charleston Marijuana Farmers Market couldn’t come at a better time, as locals have been demanding local, organic cannabis from sustainable sources for quite some time. Not only will locals be able to sample some bud, but they’ll also be able to purchase overpriced glass-blown pipes and grilled cheese sandwiches from local artisans.
North Charleston marijuana farmer Meredith Abrams praised the decision. “I’ve been growing the freshest bud in South Carolina for years, and now I have a place to showcase it,” she said. “I follow my great grand mammy’s growing recipe to produce the stankiest green around. It’s way better than that garbage oregano imported from Mexico.”
Local marijuana enthusiast Jeremy Powell said he has high standards for the reefer he intends to purchase. “I’m on a strictly Paleo diet, so my buds can’t come from anyone that also harvests grains,” he said. “I would also prefer hydroponic dope grown with water from Lake Marion. I find it to be way less harsh on my lungs.”
When asked if he saw the marijuana farmers market as problematic, North Charleston Police Chief David Gathers disagreed. “We have bigger fish to fry in North Charleston than weed,” he said. “Besides, have you ever seen potheads cause problems? Of course not. They’re the most peaceful people I’ve ever seen. Maybe they know something we don’t.”