Newlyweds Deciding Between Goose Creek Mansion and Mt. Pleasant Shanty

George and Susan Martin were just married in December and are about to plant their roots in the Charleston area, but coming to a decision on where to purchase a home is proving to be harder than they thought. With a budget of $250,000, the young couple is choosing between buying a large mansion in Goose Creek, or a condemned 200 square-foot shanty in Mount Pleasant.

Susan shared her struggles for coming up with the best option. “Mt. Pleasant is so awesome and there’s so much to do, but all we can afford there is a tiny wooden shed that smells like wet dogs. Goose Creek has much nicer homes within our budget, but the most fun thing to do in town is vaping in the Hardee’s parking lot. It’s so hard to choose.”

The couple’s real estate agent, Brenda Cummings, hopes they narrow their focus. “I think they should focus on the school districts,” she said. “A kid who graduates from Wando is likely headed off to college. If your kid goes to Goose Creek, they’ll probably end up cleaning vomit at Chuck E. Cheese. I honestly don’t give a shit either way. I still get the same commission regardless.”

After much discussion, the couple finally came to an agreement. “We’re going with the Mt. Pleasant shanty,” said George. “It may not have any electricity and we’ll have to go outside to use the bathroom, but at least we’ll be close to all the cool bars. We just need to make sure we get our tetanus shots beforeĀ moving in.”

The couple’s long-term goal is to work two jobs and save as much money as they can to afford a two bedroom home in Mt. Pleasant, which should take about 37 years.




14 Comments on "Newlyweds Deciding Between Goose Creek Mansion and Mt. Pleasant Shanty"

  1. I live in Charleston, I love this concept, and would love to write some headlines for this site. If you’re looking for contributors, let me know!

    • Joeseph C, you don’t just write headlines. News like this happens and the headlines write themselves. You can’t just write a headline and think that the news will happen. By the way, this may not post because I live in a cardboard box on Daniel Island that cost me $300k and I borrow Internet from the maid of the person whose alley I live in. Not always reliable. By the way, how is your Park Circle mansion?

  2. Goose creek just got a Dairy Queen. It opens this week. It’s the talk of the town. It’ll probably be filled with roaches and all the undereducated hood rats, but it’s coming. It’s not far from Hardee’s so maybe it’ll take over as the new vape spot.

  3. Shame on the realtor to say grads of goose creek schools will not make it. It’s not just schools who are responsible for their child’s education suceeding, no matter what school they attend. MTP schools are great because parents push education in and out of school. There are many wonderful student outside MTP whose parents could not afford the area. This realtor is why MTP is called mount plastic. Shameful our society has shrunk to the level to belittle anyone with out regard but especially unprofessional individuals.

  4. Sounds like Diana really has his thumb on the pulse! Would love to hear more of his opinions about this article!

  5. Wow, I’m a local REALTOR and cannot believe the agent said that much less allowed them to post it.

  6. Reading the replies of readers who “don’t get ” Fauxcountry News is almost as much fun as reading the articles!

  7. It kills me when people get butt hurt about this site. The commentary from people who don’t know what this is makes my day lol!!

  8. Paul armbruster | January 22, 2016 at 3:28 pm |

    Brenda Cummings sounds like such a decent lady, not. What a pig.

  9. Dear Stamps Realty guy and Diana.. The title of this website is FAUX country news. Please see definition of ‘faux.’ Thank you.

  10. Omg. These comments are hilarious.

  11. Hey, Laura. How ’bout me an you go cruise the Dairy Queen in GC this weekend šŸ˜‰

  12. haha, Diana and Stamps Realty….have you ever heard of satire?? If that was a real REALTOR, with her published name, she would have lost her license instantly…. this is “fun” stuff to read to take our minds off the “realnews”….hence, why this site is called “faux”…

  13. Even I got it wasn’t real. Pretty ‘farcey funny!

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