Controversy has been brewing in Goose Creek over what to do about the city’s outdated logo. Tempers flared on social media with pro-improvement supporters butting heads with those who hate change. Both sides came to an agreement in the 11th hour, voting in favor of ditching the flying goose and adopting a logo depicting a broken-down Winnebago on a front lawn.
Town Council Member Alan Fogerty said new logo perfectly captures the current image of Goose Creek. “We felt it was important to show the rest of the Charleston area what Goose Creek is all about. We debated between showcasing our fine fast food dining and paying tribute to our payday loan financial industry, but ultimately we decided on a broken-down Winnebago in a front yard. It really says it all.”
Mayor Michael Heitzler was devastated by the decision to remove the goose from the city’s logo. Heitzler designed the current logo himself on his Commodore 64 computer’s Print Shop program in 1980, which was also the last time Goose Creek had any economic growth. Heitzler said, “How could they get rid of my precious goose? Its dated, monotone pixilation is what makes our city look so classy. We don’t have an image problem!”
The city has hired world-renowned artist Gustov Vayner to create the perfect logo. “I thought it was going to be hard to find a broken-down Winnebago for inspiration, but it turns out there are quite a few rotting in Goose Creek front yards. It’s almost like these people are living in a pre-modern dystopia, where economic development and social improvement never took place. It’s so tragic.”
We asked several high-earning professionals currently evaluating a move to the Charleston area if they would ever consider residing in Goose Creek. Director of Volvo Engineering Linda Stuss said, “I like nice things, so I don’t think I can live in a city where the boldest economic move in the last decade was opening a Dairy Queen. I think we’re just going to buy a house in Summerville. They seem to have their shit together over there.”