Charleston Officials and Building Developers Will Have a Dance-Off To Settle Sgt. Jasper Site Dispute

Charleston officials on the Board of Architectural Review (BAR) and real estate developers have been locking horns for the last few years over proposed plans for the Sergeant Jasper site. After numerous failed proposals and appeals, a county judge has ruled that the dispute will be settled once and for all in the fairest method possible–they’re going to have a winner-take-all dance-off.

The dance-off will be held in the atrium of the Citadel Mall and will be hosted by Wade Robson, Lil’ Kim and Steve Harvey. The format of the dance-off will be “take it to the street” with strictly “straight hood” rules. The dance crew who wins the competition will take full control of the Sergeant Jasper site for good and earn mad respect.

Real Estate Developer David Goldstein was confident in his organization’s dance crew even though they’re the underdogs. “Me and my crew be ready to dominate, yo. The Charleston BAR be trippin’ and we ain’t having any of that. They gonna get served! Yup Yup!”

The Charleston BAR is the strong favorite to win the dance off. Charleston BAR Dance Crew Captains Wade and Max said, “We so good, we don’t even practice. We just do it. We’ll see who the sucka is when it’s all over.”

Mayor John Tecklenburg is looking forward to the matter being closed. “I wish they could have just settled their differences and come to an agreement as adults,” he said. “Nobody wins when things have to be settled by a potentially dangerous dance battle.”

1 Comment on "Charleston Officials and Building Developers Will Have a Dance-Off To Settle Sgt. Jasper Site Dispute"

  1. R.T. Shepherd | April 30, 2016 at 1:33 pm |

    I knew cooler heads would prevail on the matter.

Comments are closed.