A Charleston girl has finally posted an acceptable selfie on Facebook after taking 514 pictures over a span of 3 hours. Stacy Platt uploaded the chosen picture from her location at Folly Beach and now is obsessively checking for notifications to see how many people like it.
Stacy arrived at the beach with her boyfriend, Brad, at 10:00 a.m. and immediately wanted where she was to be known to everyone. She began snapping selfies, becoming increasingly dissatisfied with each one, for hours, until she finally captured the perfect one with lighting that didn’t make her neck look fat.
Brad was emotionally worn after the selfie was complete. “I swear to God, I spend a third of my life waiting for her to take pictures of herself,” he said. “Just last week, I wasted four hours trying to help her take the perfect picture in front of the Waterfront Park fountain. She tries to make it look like it’s a casual, candid photo, but she’s not fooling anyone.”
Psychologist Joyce Hamland said the obsession with taking selfies is a serious illness. “Posting pictures of yourself for the sole purpose of getting social media reactions is textbook narcissism,” she said. “They’re so blinded by their devotion to extracting attention from others that they don’t realize the stupid, puckered-lips faces they make in their selfies make them look like constipated fish. It’s a terrible affliction with no cure.”
Stacy will spend all of Memorial Day honoring fallen soldiers by trying to take the perfect picture of herself wearing plastic American flag sunglasses. She will be crushed when her friend Amy’s selfie gets 30 more Facebook likes than hers.